Finally after 16 long years I have now been officially recognized as New User of the Month! Fear not, I plan to be a merciful, most gracious New Member.
Back in 04 I became a Life Long DF member. I still have the box the DF package was shipped in, the red “Welcome to the DF” letter, and the t-shirt with the screen-print of a crow that ambiguously also looks like a rabbit.
I lost my DF card, along with $29.00 when my wallet went missing back in 2009, in 2010 I was making a move between apartments when my poster tube with the Official DF poster inside was left behind on a table in the apartments’ lobby.
But all of that isn’t good enough.
In an attempt to rejoin the Message board I contacted AFI’s new marketing team. After a lengthy explanation, and showing them a copy of the credit card’s receipt from 2004, the marketing team informed me that the only way back into our (totally not a cult) message board was to remember the E-Mail address I used to sign up and log in with.
So, obviously, my next logical step is to hire a hypnotist to swing a pendulum until I regress back to 2004, grow a devil lock, lose my facial hairs, and remember the email address. I have a feeling the email will contain more x’s than vowels.
As New Member of the month I Vow to do all in my power to right these egregious wrongs that have been perpetrated.